Saturday, January 12, 2008

Feeling unappreciated

I am Grumpy today, annoyed and irritated. In fact i just want to cry.

I am having these feelings, because i am constantly sick and try to keep a positive attitude about being such.

I am annoyed because i work hard at being positive, and no one really knows i am sick.

I am irritated because i go out of my way to make my family feel loved and they have no clue how sick i am feeling.

I am ticked off because when i am feeling sick i still go out of my way to make my family dinner, and i get comments like Chicken again? Or comments like why didn't you make this with that or... the worse, i am not hungry, when only half an hour prior i was told i am starving and asked when is dinner?

I am grumpy when i go out of my way to be a good mom, when all i want is someone to mother me when i am feeling like crap.

I am rather annoyed at the moment that my husband had the gall to complain about the butter being left out and having to deal with a soft messy butter wrapper, when i did not have to cook at all! I could have said fend for yourself, i feel awful and did not want to cook! So deal with the little bit of a mess that i left out after cooking.

I am wanting to cry because i woke sick again, and will most likely go out of my way to fix dinner for my family, and not hear a positive word about me doing so.

I want to cry because my house is a mess, and i do not want to clean it up, but hate living in a mess. It makes me feel worse. So chances are good i will clean, and put a positive face on.

Maybe i should tell them to find a maid. At least they get a pay check.


J.D. Scorpio said...

Hello Mysti:
I’m sorry that you are having a bad day, and that you’re feeling bad! Could it be that you being sick is adding to the un-wanted and un-appreciated feelings you are getting from your family? Could it be that a great big bear hug and a few kind words could be the remedy? And brighten up your day??
A suggestion too…. It might help if you told everyone when you don’t feel up to par. You never know, that might help more than you know! My best to you and yours………… JD

MYSTI said...

J.D. Thank you for the words. Yes of course being sick most likely has my emotions out of whack , and i may very well be over reacting, but i still think it would be nice to feel like my family appreciates me when i am sick and still cooking for them. Smiles. A huge hug always helps, and never hurts. :)) It does brighten my day. I though do not feel like i should have to tell my family how sick i am. It is very obvious. Thank you for stopping by my blog and leaving your comment. May your day be a blessed one.

Raine said...

I think you should let them fend for themselves when you feel so badly.'m sure they are quite capable of throwing together some sandwiches and even bringing you one.Dont feel put upon! Tell them you feel like crap and they are in charge of dinner!! End of subject. A few meals of their own design and yours will probably be very appreciated. They are also capable of helping round the house too!

MYSTI said...

Normally i would agree with you raine regarding this. I am sick so many days of the year lately that i can not constantly expect my family to fend for themselves. I have to bite the bullet some days no matter how badly i feel and be a mom. :) They do clean, do not get me wrong, but on this topic again, i to have to do my share. I get fed up at times and i feel like venting so i did. Thank you so much for your support.


'Tart said...

Hi Mysti,
I just found this post. You are right it is horrible to carry such heavy burdens. It has always amazed me that you carry on so strongly and so well in the face of such difficult burdens. It surely must be because of your faith, because something gets you through every time.

I think that between caring for your family, even if it is a few minutes between, you SHOULD do things to take care of yourself. Something that makes you happy. You have hobbies. You can pray. Sometimes hard, if there's no time until the next onslaught. But I bet if you ALLOW yourself to have some time, there will be some. And yes, you 147% and 5/6ths Deserve it, Luv. Love thyself as thy loves your family. Wow! That is powerful.

MYSTI said...

I am trying to hard to take care of myself sweet Tart. One day at a time, and yes what a powerful quote!