Monday, January 14, 2008

Give me a break!

I am sitting here just stunned.

I just watched Dr. Phil with my husband. We both sat there through out the show thinking oh this is a crock! Its B.S. !!

The show was on a teen growing up in a household where the parents yelled a lot.

Ok... I sat and watched and thought yes the mother is out of control. I also thought there is more to this story. The teen was just as awful as the parent.

Yes Parents are the adults and yes they should be the ones in control. I do not have any complaint there.

What i do have a complaint on is what was said by doctor Phil's wife. She was asked by her husband (Dr. Phil) if she ever once yelled at their sons. Her response was NO!!!! According to her, she never once has ever raised her voice at her sons. That in her eyes they are perfect little angles, and she would never have dreamed of yelling or even raising her voice at them.

OHHHHH Give me a break!!! What parent has not yelled at their child? Am i totally being unreasonable here in thinking that if you are a parent you will yell?? Parents are human after all. I am not talking about the kind of yelling where the parents are calling their child names. I am talking about simply yelling. For instance I have yelled at my sons to stop messing around, or they will break something! I have yelled at them when they have scared me out of my wits. I have yelled at them when i am so tired, and they have done nothing all day but give me a headache.

According to the show, and them i am an awful mom! I have yelled at my sons, i have raised my voice, and yes i have even lost my sanity doing such!

I love my sons. I adore them. Yes i am proud of them as well. I to care about how they will turn out. I however have lost my patience with them at times through out the years, and flat out yelled.

Does that mean I am an awful mom? Should i have all along not once yelled, or raised my voice at them even a little bit?

For the most part i am a quiet person, and rather patient truthfully. I was accused of not being able to be heard before i had my sons. People told me all the time to speak up. That I was to soft spoken.

When i had my first born son, i found my voice that is for sure.

I can not think of one parent, even with the most perfect kids (if there is such a thing), that have not yelled. Only perfect child i ever heard of was Jesus. Dr. Phil's son's must also be such. They after all are perfect.) Rolling my eyes.

Umm come on now, be real. When they made these comments, I totally lost respect for both of them.

If you are a parent have you ever yelled at your child? Or raised your voice?

If you are not a parent, were you ever yelled at as a child?

Do you consider yourself a bad parent, or think your parents as such for yelling?


wolfbaby said...

I have been assured by doctors no less that it is perfectly normal to yell. Not always a good thing mind but it is normal to lose your patience and yell. My T said once that she did lose her patience a time or two, and she's trained to deal with kids. Dosn't mean a person is going to be perfect.. gesh. It's human nature to not be perfect. It's sad when someone claims to be or do somethin gthere not.. ugh. If you don't ever hear yelling then how are you going to know it's ok to express yourself? even in a loud way. The line is and should be drawn and the what i call "bad' yelling. You know when you scream names and obsenties at your kids.. now that is bad..and that I don't do

casey said...

LOL...I am with you on this. Firstly...I find it very difficult to take the "Dr. Phil & Robin" show seriously.

I raised 2 kids who are today...well adjusted adults. I yelled at them...of that I am sure. I do believe I even spanked them a couple of times!

Why he ever has Robin on the show to dispense advice is so curious to me. I must admit...when he does that, he loses all credibility. Dr. Phil is just another power hungry celebrity chaser and name dropper.

'Tart said...

If you or anyone else is a 'bad parent' it's clearly because we're being labelled badly by bad 'psychiatrists!'

Dr. Phil is just a crock anyway. It would be too much to have a real doc for the 'pop therapy' performed on that show.


MYSTI said...

Thank you everyone for agreeing with me! lol

Fallen Angels said...

I have NEVER like Dr Phil...and this is a really good example of why! When my youngest nephew was 3, we were taking a walk to the park and when we got near the park he saw it, yanked his little hand out of mine and ran towards the park...right into the street! So what did I do? I YELLED, of course...along with running after him and grabbing him, probably a bit roughly! So I guess according to Dr Phil...this makes me a terible person and it's really a good thing I'm not a parent. only other option was to let him risk getting hit by a car. Maybe it's just me, but that seems way worse than yelling! Parents occasionally yell...sometimes it's the only way they will be heard, and the importance of what they are saying will come across. That's reality. As long as they aren't yelling A LOT and berating the child, then I don't see it as a problem. And to answer one of your questions...yes I was yelled at, sometimes like my example, but often to berate, belittle or just generally to be made to feel worthless...THAT is the yelling that is bad! Oh...and guess who never ran into the street again?

MYSTI said...

Laughs, I was just telling a good friend of mine the very exact thing you just did. I to yelled at my oldest son when i was 8 months pregnant with my youngest son. He to like your nephew was running toward a busy street. I yelled at him to stop! The whole neighborhood heard me. lol He however did stop instantly. I also agree with you, its better to yell then to have had him hit by a car. Rolling my eyes.

Blessings and thanks for the comment.